The Diary of Justin Bieber
Dear Diary,
Today I traveled back in time using the time machine app I got for christmas. I wound up in early 1940s Nazi Germany. #swag #naziswag I thought it would be cool to see what it was like there.
I was disoriented when I arrived. Not knowing exactly where or when I would show up. I heard some SS Officers in the distance and quickly hid behind a crate. I knew since I don’t speak a word of German, they would probably be suspicious, think i’m an American spy or something. The strange thing is, though, I realized I could understand what they were saying. I guess it’s part of the whole time travel thing. #timetravelswag
Still, the clothes I was wearing were not of the time, so being spotted would be not swag. Plus I had a guitar on me. Did guitars even exist in the 40s? Probably not (authors note: yes, they did). I ducked in and out of alleyways, this was getting to dangerous. I check my time machine app, it has a two hour cool down period, so I was stuck until then. If I was caught, they’d surely take my phone and probably change history. YOLO. Maybe not. If the Nazis got their hands on my phone I might not be born at all. I could still hear the Nazis, but it sounded like they were getting farther away. I leaned back in relief, when my guitar strings must have plucked a piece of wood or something sticking out. #worsttiming
The Nazis def heard me, and I could hear them coming for me with my beautiful singer ears. I took off running, but they were catching up, they knew these streets. I ran down an alleyway, but it was a dead end. I was so fucked. I could hear them getting closer. I was thinking about what to do. I couldn’t fight, they had guns. Maybe if I could shove my phone up my ass, they’d take me for questioning and I could stall until I could time travel again. I was getting ready to pull my pants down, when a door I didn’t even notice swung open and I was pulled inside. #timingswag
I was whisked up some stairs and brought into a room. The person that grabbed me was a girl. Maybe 14, I dunno. She told me to be quiet and introduced me to her family and finally herself, her name was Anne. It took me a minute to realize, but she was Anne Frank, the girl with the diary. #bookswag
I was excited to meet her. She was a historical figure, but I knew I had to hide it. I felt sad, knowing that this girl would die in only a couple years, but her words would go on to be a first hand account of the atrocities committed during the war. #heroswag
We talked for a bit, Her family gave me some water and bread and offered to let me stay for the night. The whole family was stuffed into this one attic. Anne gave me a blanket and pillow and set me up near her corner. She asked me about my guitar and I told her I was a travelling musician trapped in Germany when the war broke out. She asked me to play a song and told me as long as played softly, no one outside would hear. I started playing, I could see her being mesmerized. I doubt she had heard live music in years, but it was more than that, it was the way I moved my fingers across the guitar strings, the way I was singing. I could tell, this girl was a true Belieber. Maybe the truest Belieber ever, and she would be dead, decades before I was even born. #AnneFrankSwag
Before long her family was asleep and it was the the two of us, sitting by candle light talking. She look mesmerizing. I don’t exactly know when, but we slowly just stopped talking and just stared into each others eyes. I don’t know who stared it, but the next thing I knew we were making out. I don’t think she had ever kissed anyone before, but she was a quick learner. We kissed for what seemed like hours, but it was only minutes. I knew girls in the 40s probably were more uptight, but I knew I had to have more of her and something in her eyes knew this too. I lifted her top off and gazed at her breasts. They were some of the best i’ve ever seen. I kissed down to her nipples and took one in my mouth. I could her her gasp, quickly putting her hands over her mouth, so she wouldn’t wake her parents, or worse the Nazi patrols outside. She had clearly never felt anything like this before, and it made me happy to know I could give her one bit of happiness in a life that was only going to get worse. I pushed those thoughts out of my head, and focused on the girl in front of me. I worked my was down and in a swift motion, removed her skirt and underwear, exposing her vagina to the candlelight. I dug in, fiercely lapping at her labia. Anne grabbed her pillow and screamed in pleasure into it. Within a minute she was cumming. I kissed her and she started to disrobe be.
Once I was naked she got ready to mount me, but I stopped her. There was something I wanted first. I guided her head down to my shaft and told her to suck. She was confused at first, but figured out what I wanted. She sucked my dick. It was #swag. The way she moved her lips and tongue around my dick was incredible. She had probably never seen a dick before, but was sucking like a world champion. She sucked my balled and licked my shaft. It was the best blow job I had ever had, and it was from Anne Frank. I was nearing my climax as Anne pumped and sucked like mad. I told her a was going to cum and to open her mouth, she obeyed. I shot my load all over her face and mouth. Then we had sex and anal sex. #analswag
The next morning we awoke startled. We got dressed quickly, just before the Nazis burst through the door. We hid, but were spotted fast. I wanted to help, but I knew what had to happen. I kissed her one last time and told her to remember our time together, but keep it to yourself, don’t write about it. I then ran to the boarded up window and kicked it open. I pulled out my phone and loaded my my time machine app. Anne yelled “I love you Justin Bieber, i’ll never forget you.” I turned to the window and looked back as said “swag,” and leaped out the window, activating the time machine just before I hit the ground.
When I got back, I visited the Anne Frank Museum. It was heartbreaking, but I knew what she had done for the world, but the world didn’t know her like I did. She was a Belieber, a hero, she was good in bed. I signed the guestbook and left.
And here we are diary, I’m back, and she’s dead. Just like history intended. I’m alive. She’s dead. And I just have to live with it. Have the memory of the time we spent together and just forget about the rest. Well fuck it.
Diary. I’m going to save Anne Frank and kill Hitler.
#swag